What's After This?

By: N.C.

I often wonder what's next, 

when I close my eyes take my last breath, 

when my heart stops beating lungs stop breathing, 

What's gonna happen after death, 

Physically, I know what happens, 

My skin gets cold and my bowel's let go, 

The muscles in my body tighten but after that

that's all I know, 

What's gonna happen here on earth, 

Who's gonna smile, who's gonna cry, 

Who's gonna say "that's good for him",

Who's gonna say "damn why'd he die",

It really makes no difference whether I'm 

turned to ash or simply buried, 

But where's my body gonna go, 

To the crematorium or the cemetery, 

I'm just curious I want to know, 

Put in a vin or in the dirt, 

I'd like also like to know if I died quickly

or did it hurt, 

And how's it gonna happen, 

A heart attack or in a car, 

or something violent like gunshot wounds,

or getting stabbed on my block 183 & Davidson Ave.,

But even more I want to know what's 

gonna happen to my soul, 

Nothing else really matters, 

Not cremation or a dirt filled hole, 

Will my spirit slowly rise until I see those

pearly gates, 

Where everything is peaceful, 

And all the ones I've lost await, 

Up in heaven where its always sunny, 

It's never cloudy there's never rain, 

Where everyone is always happy, 

There's no more problems no more pain, 

I might be wrong and take a plunge, 

Down to hell where it's always hot, 

It's where I'll be for eternity, 

Where pain and torment is all I got, 

The devil's waiting and he gets to laugh, 

I see the fire and I start to scream, 

The fire's burning, I try to wake up, 

I can't wake up, it's not a dream, 

That thought there scares me, 

I've done bad things in my life, 

I've done much sinning and seen my death 5 times, 

In my heart there's good and evil but the

evil side would wind up winning, 

So now I wonder what's gonna happen, 

Where will I go when I leave earth, 

I'm so anxious I want to know, 

Will things be better- will things be worse, 

But there's no rush I'll get my answer, 

Everyone of us one day dies,

And I hear that GOD's full of forgiveness, 

So all I can do is pray for mine.

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